The Jesus Movement-Revolution Was All About LOVE

In the late 1970s, I was attracted to LOVE. I was attracted to The Jesus Movement, sometimes called The Jesus Revolution. So was my husband and we met "there."

That was the time when it was "totally cool" to be high on Jesus and to LOVE. I sort of stumbled on Calvary Chapel and I saw hippies loving Jesus. I found I had to be around all that love.

It didn't occur to me that I didn't "know Jesus," but the love that was passed around in those days was catching. I didn't have to pretend to love. Something wonderful came out of me and I do believe that love that came out of me was guided by God.

There's a group on Facebook: Original Jesus Freaks - Were You One of Them?

The main related thing I see in the group's discussion is Calvary Chapel (or churches related to or like Calvary Chapel). Love and peace were so much a part of Calvary Chapels in those days. The same love was at the Atherton House.

I miss that time.

If I could find people that loved like the "Jesus Freaks" loved in those days, I'd go to where those people are. Young people find it easy to gather. In time, it's not easy to find people that just love for the sake of loving. There are two many walls in the way as we grow older.

I'm ending this post with one of favorite songs from that time.

Charity - Music and Lyrics by Kenn Gulliksen

Based on 1 Corinthians 13

Although I speak with tongues

Of men and of angels

And though I prophesy

And understand all

Although I have all faith
So mountains may be removed
And though I feed the poor
And give of my life

Chorus:

If I have not charity
If love does not flow from me
I am nothing
Jesus reduce me to love

Love is patient and kind
Love is not envious
Not proud but gentle and meek
Seeks not its own way
Love sings when Jesus prevails
Believes and endures all things
Love hopes and bears every wrong
And love never fails

Repeat Chorus

One season I was a child
I spoke and I thought as a child
But when I turned to a man
Such ways put aside
Though now we see through a glass
Yet then we shall see face to face
Though now abide faith and hope
The greatest is love

Repeat Chorus

Narrowing Down What I Believe or Might Believe

I was laying in bed this morning thinking about what I believe (or might believe). I have to put some thoughts down in writing since I've just been so confused lately.

Here's my list:

1) I do believe in God with my whole heart and mind.

I love these words:

"And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might."

2) I do believe what is described in the Torah did really happen.

I can't explain why, but I do.

3) I do believe that Jesus did live on this earth and the things described about his time on earth in the New Testament probably did happen.

The stories were recorded for a reason.

4) I do believe (almost I think) that Jesus did die and perhaps did appear on the earth again because God can make anything happen.

Now comes the hard part:

5) I still think that there is more than one way to God. Jesus may be a way, and even though the New Testament says believing that Jesus died for me and others is the only way, I just don't believe that is true.

Comment:

Why, if I don't believe Jesus is the only way, did I tell Lynn Wein McCoy I was ready to pray with her last February? Why did I feel something change in me after praying with Lynn? Why did I tell a few select friends about the change in me?

I just don't know the answers to those questions.

I told Lynn that I no longer thought the story of Jesus dying on the cross was a fairy tale. I wanted to have God in my life. At the time, I needed God so much. Jesus seemed like a way for me at the time.

Right now, I seem to be happier with being Jo Ann who seeks God as a Jew. I love so many things about Judaism and want to pass that way of seeking God to my children. I've been doing that for years.

Like I said, I love these words:

"And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might."

Deuteronomy 6:4-9

Sh'ma Yis'ra'eil Adonai Eloheinu Adonai echad. Hear, Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One.

In an undertone: Barukh sheim k'vod malkhuto l'olam va'ed. Blessed be the Name of His glorious kingdom for ever and ever.

V'ahav'ta eit Adonai Elohekha b'khol l'vav'kha uv'khol naf'sh'kha uv'khol m'odekha. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.

V'hayu had'varim ha'eileh asher anokhi m'tzav'kha hayom al l'vavekha. And these words that I command you today shall be in your heart.

V'shinan'tam l'vanekha v'dibar'ta bam And you shall teach them diligently to your children, and you shall speak of them

b'shiv't'kha b'veitekha uv'lekh't'kha vaderekh uv'shakh'b'kha uv'kumekha when you sit at home, and when you walk along the way, and when you lie down and when you rise up.

Uk'shar'tam l'ot al yadekha v'hayu l'totafot bein einekha. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be for frontlets between your eyes.

Ukh'tav'tam al m'zuzot beitekha uvish'arekha. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

John 1: 29--33 - lamb of God?

I really don't understand any of what is below. I do "get" the idea that Passover lambs were sacrificed so the the Hebrews were spared in Egypt, so there must be some parallel here.

-------------------------

Jesus the Lamb of God

29The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, “Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!30This is the one I meant when I said, ‘A man who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’ 31I myself did not know him, but the reason I came baptizing with water was that he might be revealed to Israel.”

32Then John gave this testimony: “I saw the Spirit come down from heaven as a dove and remain on him. 33I would not have known him, except that the one who sent me to baptize with water told me, ‘The man on whom you see the Spirit come down and remain is he who will baptize with the Holy Spirit.’ 34I have seen and I testify that this is the Son of God.”

Proverbs 3: 5--6 - My thoughts

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
6 In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.

Last night, I "went" to the weekly online discussion group that is associated with Lynn's church, McClean Bible Church. During the discussion, the leader, Cindy, kept posting the above lines from Proverbs over and over.

Rather than commenting on more of John 1 today, I will "take a break" today and comment on those verses.

I love those words. That's really all I need to say...I want to do that. I've wanted to do so for a very long time and wonder why I can't do what the verses recommend from a Jewish point of view.

My studies with Partners in Torah have taught me that those who followed God faithfully went on the right path.

I have noticed that from the orthodox Jewish point of view, it takes work and diligence to work towards doing what the Proverts verses ask; I also think Christians would use those verses as reminders of God's faithfulness.

My Two Identities

I saw this movie once about a guy who had two lives. He actually had two wives. One wife had children and with that wife he led a traditional existence. The other wife didn't want children. When he was with that wife, he led the life of a free person who did lots of wild things.

He didn't want either wife to know he had a very different life somewhere else and with someone else. I recall he was happy with that existence until somehow he got caught!

Okay...now I'm not doing that...I don't have two different families or anything...but...

There are two of ME sort of:

One is Jo Ann the Jew who has loves being Jewish. That person is open about who she is and what her family believes and is comfortable sharing how she worships G-d as a Jew. That person fits into the Colorado Springs Jewish community and is passing her love of Judaism on to her children. That person loves G-d with her whole heart, but is open and thinks that whatever way someone chooses to follow God is okay. That person is happy with being Jewish and sees lots of wonderful things in the Jewish way of life.

The other is Jo Ann, who is Jewish, who maybe would like to explore or follow Jesus just in case that is the way to God. That person doesn't want anyone (except for a select few) to know she is considering any of "this." That person is also having a hard time believing there is only one way to God, but seems to be seeking something. That person is uncomfortable with a lot of things she associates with Christianity.

When these two identities meet, there seems to be a battle inside of me. Sometimes I cringe thinking about even exploring anything Christian, but yet, something keeps telling me I should not totally walk away from it.

Light these lights and see the way to You

Two weeks ago, our family attended the family service at Temple Shalom. The rabbi invited every woman present to come up to the Bimah and light the Shabbat candles.

Something moved inside of me as I lit the lights with Annabelle and the other girls and women present. I realized that Jewish women have been lighting lights on the Sabbath for centuries! Here I was lighting the lights and seeking God with my whole heart as I did so.

I keep listening to the song over and over again. You see, lighting lights is a very Jewish thing to do. It's not just a ritual. As I hear the song, I do see a way and path to God.

• Listen to part of Light These Lights

Here's the lyrics:

Oh hear my prayer I sing to You.
Be gracious to the ones I love
And bless them with goodness and mercy and peace.
Oh hear my prayer to You.

Let us light these lights and see the way to You.
And let us say: Amen.
Let us light these lights and see the way to You.
And let us say: Amen.

Debbie Friedman wrote:

"Light These Lights is based on a traditional prayer of petition. It was written by an Ashkenazi woman in Hebrew asking G-d to have compassion over her loved ones. I assumed that this woman recited this prayer as she kindled some candles either for Yom Tov [holy day] or Shabbat [Sabbath]. I wrote Light These Lights the first year I did the Mayan [Passover] Seders in New York. I was moved by the text and by what I thought to be the potential experience of the seders; it reminded me of the warmth and sweetness of my Bubby and the hope that light brings to us moments of challenge."

Pretending to be a Christian

Yesterday, my son, Joel, and I read an article that addressed the myth of Christian persecution in the United States.

As we were reading, in the middle of the article, Joel exclaimed, "Why don't I just pretend to be a Christian? If I did so, I'd be more accepted in this world."

I thought about Joel's words last night.

I remember when I was young, I wondered what it would have been like to be born a Christian rather than be born Jewish. I knew then, if I was a Christian I'd be like everyone else (well, like most people) in the U.S.A. I could wear Easter dresses, eat Easter brunch, and truly enjoy Christmas full scale.

Shortly after that, I went through motions and pretended to be one. Years passed. Eventually, years later, I came a time where I realized I couldn't stand doing any of "it" or pretending any longer and went back to being "just plain Jewish."

I never again want to pretend to be a Christian.

Lynn told me last week that I don't have to do anything if I believe Jesus is the messiah, but she also explained that a baby left alone doesn't grow. Going to church and getting fellowship she explained are necessary for a Christian's well being. I don't get why listening to sermon after sermon or bible study after bible study keeps a Christian strong, but she says those things help too.

Am I "a baby Christian" or am I just someone who pretended again to believe? Lynn says someone can't go in and out...that is someone can't believe and be changed inside and then all of a sudden stop. But...that's what seems to have happened to me. Did I fake the whole thing?

I just have so much trouble with this "one way" idea. Yes, it says in the New Testament that Jesus is the only way, but that just doesn't make sense to me.

I keep saying this over and over again, but I like being Jewish and seeking God as a Jew. Why do Jews have to believe in Jesus? The Jews that I know that love G-d, believe that following the Torah somewhat or to the letter is the way to God. They do live by rules, and yes, they have rejected Jesus and are clear on what they believe.

As I read the New Testament and read about the Jews that rejected Jesus and his mesage, I relate a bit. The thing is, if I've truly rejected Jesus, has God abandoned me?

(One last thought: I'm very grateful that Lynn and my friend Marion have not given up on me...they at least get me to think about these issues...)

More thoughts on John 1: 14 -- 28

I read more of John 1 last night. Instead of going verse by verse, I'll just write down a summary of some of my thoughts.

This section is about John the Baptist. I recall that the end of the Jews for Jesus Christ in the Passover script that there was this closing line: "The prophet, the forerunner has come and so has the Messiah."

Now, I also recall holding up Elijah's cup and saying something about Elijah being John the Baptist, so this section, where John the Baptist says he is NOT Elijah is confusing.

I also see that people wondered if John the Baptist was the messiah. How come? Was he performing miracles or teaching?

I also wonder what it was like to be there then. Did some people think this character was just some crazy guy?

15John testifies concerning him. He cries out, saying, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’” 16From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. 17For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. 18No one has ever seen God, but God the One and Only,^e,f who is at the Father’s side, has made him known.

John the Baptist Denies Being the Christ

19Now this was John’s testimony when the Jews of Jerusalem sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was. 20He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, “I am not the Christ.^g”

21They asked him, “Then who are you? Are you Elijah?”

He said, “I am not.”

“Are you the Prophet?”

He answered, “No.”

22Finally they said, “Who are you? Give us an answer to take back to those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?”

23John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the desert, ‘Make straight the way for the Lord.’”^h

24Now some Pharisees who had been sent 25questioned him, “Why then do you baptize if you are not the Christ, nor Elijah, nor the Prophet?”

26“I baptize withⁱ water,” John replied, “but among you stands one you do not know. 27He is the one who comes after me, the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie.”

28This all happened at Bethany on the other side of the Jordan, where John was baptizing.

Continuing Assignment - John 1: 6--14

I will continue reading John 1 and jot down my thoughts.

6) There came a man who was sent from God; his name was John.

I've been told John was the promised prophet who was to come before the messiah. Some say he was Elijah the prophet.

7) He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all men might believe.

It sounds like John came to tell people the light, the messiah, was about to come. I guess he came because it was said earlier that someone would come before the messiah.

8) He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.

Yes, that make sense. John was not the messiah...the light...

9) The true light that gives light to every man was coming into the world.

Yes, John says the true light, the messiah is coming...

10) He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him.

So Jesus came and was not recognized as the messiah, the light.

11) He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him.

I know he came to the Jewish people first, but the Jews did not believe he was the messiah.

12) Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—

This means that those who believed that Jesus was/is the messiah, no matter if they were Jew or Gentile, were/are accepted by God.

13) ...children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.

I don't get this verse...

14) The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

I get part of this verse...the Word...whatever that is...was Jesus...Jesus came to the earth for a time and lived among men.

I don't understand the other sentence.

John: Chapter 1: 1--5 - My thoughts

Lynn Wein McCoy gave me an assignment. She suggested I read John Chapter 1 and write down thoughts on it. I can't remember specifically what she asked me to write about, but I will write something down...

1) In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

Now, reading that isolated make no sense What in the world was the Word? I've been told the Word was and is Jesus, but why doesn't it say so in black and white in this verse?

2) He was with God in the beginning.

Now I know He was with God. That's what this verse says, but is the writer just saying this? It is confusing...where does this conclusion come from? Bible commentaries? From the writer?

3) Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.

Okay, now God made all things. I believe that.

4) In him was life, and that life was the light of men.

I believe that God is the creator of life, yes. I also believe that God does bring a certain light to life and this world.

5) The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it.

I was thinking about this today. Good always shines over evil. Light shining in darkness I do understand.

Things seem dark to me right now (and I've lost whatever hope I had). I can't seem to understand why, but for awhile, I "saw the light." The bit of light I saw doesn't seem real now.

I Feel Nothing

Today, I was asked what I felt about a recent religious discussion.

I responded that I felt NOTHING. I feel nothing. It's like whatever connection I had with God is GONE. I feel NOTHING. Nothing is there.

I keep listening to this song from Chorus Line. In the song, a character named Morales talks about her experience in a high school acting class. For weeks, she felt NOTHING. She sings about how she dug to the bottom of her soul and tried, but still felt NOTHING. The teacher and kids in the class say she is hopeless. She even goes to church and asks for guidance. She says at that point, she realizes her whole experience with that class is absurd and moves on.

I am digging to "the bottom of my soul" and I'm trying, but I feel NOTHING.

(Note: Also...when I try to read the New Testament, it is impossible for me to understand. I might as well be reading Russian or Chinese words...it's like I'm getting picture without sound or something...)

Comparison

A friend sent me a video of her son's Bar Mitzvah. It was certainly different than my daughter's recent Bat Mitzvah.

The main difference in the two ceremonies is that Rebekah's Bat Mitzvah was about Rebekah. It was about Rebekah's being Jewish and growing as a Jew.

The other ceremony was a messianic Bar Mitzvah. It was very different. That Bar Mitzvah was all about Jesus.

Interesting...I liked both ceremonies. They are just very different.

A Book Called "The Janitor's Girl" Inspired My Life

When I was a little girl, growing up in the 1960s, thanks to my parents, I learned to love books. I read constantly. We ddin't have good things to watch on TV, so books were the way to go. Schools gave us a chance to buy inexpensive paperback books from Scholastic Books.

One book I read when I was about ten or eleven years old changed my life. The book is called The Janitor's Girl. The author of the book is Frieda Friedman.

The story is about a girl named Sue who moves to New York City into a huge high rise apartment building. Her father is the Building Superindent ...the janitor.

Sue's sister warns Sue that others will look down on her because of their father's job. Sue doesn't believe that could be possible.

At first, things go okay for the story's heroine Then, a snobby rich family moves into the building. The snobby family has a daughter named Rosalie who looks down on Sue because of her father's job. Rosalie's family are mean people and Rosalie is mean.

Soon Sue is shut out of an exclusive club Rosalie starts and girls she thought were faithful friends won't associate with her.

As first Sue is really upset, but then she does something that changes her life. She befriends some immigrant kids that are not accepted by many Americans. The "outcasts" form their own club and do some really fun and inexpensive things together in New York City.

Some of the girls in Rosalie's exclusive club realize that Sue really has a good thing going. Eventually, they decide that Sue and her friends are really true and faithful friends. They realize that being exclusive or hurting others is not the way to behave.

The Janitor's Girl teaches a lesson. The lesson is that following a prestigious or exclusive group is not always the right way. Following or associating with "outcasts" or those who aren't in the "in-crowd" may be the way to go!

I have followed what I learned from that book for my entire life. I try to never be unfriendly or snobbly. I include, rather than exclude, anyone who wants to be included in my circle of friends. When I have been shut out, I form something new that includes. I've passed on this outlook to my children. I hope they will use that attitude throughout their lives.

I do hope that those who read this can also use this lesson in your own life!