Friday, July 15, 2011

I Feel Nothing

Today, I was asked what I felt about a recent religious discussion.

I responded that I felt NOTHING. I feel nothing. It's like whatever connection I had with God is GONE. I feel NOTHING. Nothing is there.

I keep listening to this song from Chorus Line. In the song, a character named Morales talks about her experience in a high school acting class. For weeks, she felt NOTHING. She sings about how she dug to the bottom of her soul and tried, but still felt NOTHING. The teacher and kids in the class say she is hopeless. She even goes to church and asks for guidance. She says at that point, she realizes her whole experience with that class is absurd and moves on.

I am digging to "the bottom of my soul" and I'm trying, but I feel NOTHING.

(Note: Also...when I try to read the New Testament, it is impossible for me to understand. I might as well be reading Russian or Chinese words...it's like I'm getting picture without sound or something...)


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